You Never Lose By Giving Love
Introduction
You never lose by giving love, because offering it with sincerity, passion and precise passion honors you as a person. On the other hand, those who do not know how to accept or take care of this enormous gift are those who really lose. For this reason, you should never regret love and loss, because the worst thing is not knowing how to love.
Fortunately, neuroscience provides new and revealing information every day explaining why you behave as you do with this thing called love. The first thing to remember is that your human brain is not ready to lose. Hence, it beats you, paralyzes you, and frustrates you in suffering.
“Love has no cure, but it is the only medicine for all ills”-Leonard Cohen-
You are genetically programmed to connect with others and build emotional bonds. These make you feel safe and help you build your life. In fact, that's how we survived as a species, by communicating with others. Therefore, loss, separation, or even a simple misunderstanding can immediately trigger an alarm signal in your mind.
Another complex aspect of emotional relationships is the way you experience this separation and losses. From a neurological point of view, stress hormones are released immediately and, in many cases, form what we know as a "broken heart". However, from an emotional and psychological point of view, you may experience another kind of reality.
In fact, you don't just suffer from the pain associated with losing who you love. You also feel a loss of energy and vital breathing. It seems as if all the love you have given, and all the hopes and passion you have devoted to this person, has also faded, making you feel empty, infertile, and wilted.
How can you love again if the only things left inside you are bad memories? Well, in fact, you need to face these moments differently. Let's take a closer look.
Continue giving love or avoid loving again?
You are made up of a precise and chaotic compendium of past stories, living emotions, buried bitterness, and camouflaged fears. When you start a new relationship, don't put all your previous experiences in the recycling basket. You don't start from scratch. Everything still exists, and the way you manage your past will determine whether you live your emotional present with greater maturity and fullness.
“Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. “-Alfred Lord Tennyson-
Bitter betrayal or the fact that your partner's love for you is dead dramatically changes the way you see things. In fact, giving love intensely at some point, only to find yourself later feeling empty and trapped by your lost memories and dreams can completely change your personality composition.
For example, you may become unsure of yourself. Alternatively, you may adopt the isolationist position that to avoid suffering, it is better not to love at all. However, these are slow processes of self-destruction.
You should never regret loving yourself, or risking everything or nothing for this person. It is these works that give you your dignity and make you a wonderful human being. Living is loving and giving love meaning to your life through all the things you do: your work, hobbies, personal and emotional relationships.
If you renounce love or regret love, you also give up the most beautiful part of yourself.
Healing lost love
The University of Binghamton (USA) and the University College of London (United Kingdom) conducted a study stating that there are certain differences between men and women when it comes to dealing with emotional breakdowns. In fact, their emotional responses are very different. For example, women feel much more the effect of separation. However, they tend to recover earlier than men.
On the other hand, men usually appear, outwardly, fine. They give the impression that they are strong and tend to resort to their jobs and responsibilities. However, they could not always overcome the separation. Moreover, it may take years to do so. The reason for this is that women usually have better skills in managing their emotional world. In fact, they gain comfort because they ask for help and face what happened from a tolerant perspective. This makes moving easier.
However, regardless of the sex or cause of separation, there is one thing to consider. It's the fact that no emotional failure should stop you from feeling happy again. Therefore, you must say no to being a slave to the past and a prisoner of eternal suffering.
Another aspect to remember is that love is not synonymous with suffering. For this reason, you shouldn’t ever keep a relationship going that’s well past its sell-by-date. Removing yourself will save unnecessary heartbreak and your brave goodbye will close one door and another will open, the one where love will be conjugated with the word happiness.
Golden tips for a Successful Romantic Relationship
The first pink stage of love relationships is one of the most beautiful and important stages, attention to some things makes this stage a solid foundation for a strong extended emotional relationship, and making some mistakes will destroy the relationship from the beginning.
The state of optimism, constant smiling, and eye gloss. One of the symptoms associated with the first stages of love, in which each party tries to uncover the mystery of the other and sound its temptations. This period is the cornerstone that determines the course of the relationship thereafter. There are some things to consider during this period, so that it passes peacefully and the relationship develops healthily, according to the German website Betsihongs Raghber, which specializes in social relationships:
- Honesty and candor: Honesty from the outset is the most important fundamental of the relationship and helps to succeed thereafter despite potential difficulties. Hiding certain facts or even trying to "decorate them" could lead to the breakdown of the relationship sooner or later.
- Avoid attempts to change the other: It is natural for your lover to have certain qualities that do not suit you perfectly, but this is a natural issue to accept as no one applies to all the specifications you want. For men, in particular, he escapes the relationship as soon as he feels that women are trying to change his qualities and draw a line to walk on.
- I don't lie, but I make up?: trying to paint a picture of yourself is not reality, it's going to put you in a frame that's hard for you to get out of afterward, so not overestimating yourself is the best way to build a healthy relationship.
- Maintain "free space": attachment does not mean forgetting friends and neglecting sports and various hobbies. It is a bad habit for a woman to feel resentful when she knows that her lover wants to spend time with his friends, or when the man objects to the woman going to the gym. Although the reasons for these things are usually due to the desire of each party to spend as much time as possible with the other, they are destructive to emotional relationships. As for giving the life partner enough freedom to spend some things away from you, it has a great advantage, which is to increase the state of longing.
- Slow down before meeting the family: The woman asks the man to meet her family as soon as he is identified, a matter that makes the man feel like he is under a certain pressure to speed up the marriage application. Although it is important to know the family of the other party, experts advise that you slow down before taking this step.
- Don't plan a decade: One of the things that also worries men at the beginning of a relationship is his discovery that the woman who has just begun dating her, plans to detail her future with him, the number of their children, and their place of residence in the coming years, these things stimulate the desire of the man to escape to retain his freedom, says German emotional relations expert Maximilian Finkler.
- Preserving the appearance: Each party's attention to its elegance is a matter that both parties are keen on at the beginning of the relationship and often decreases over time. You don't mind looking at makeup or sportswear when meeting a potential life partner, but you shouldn't turn this into neglect of appearance. The same applies to a man who should not neglect to wear his clothes and take care of his appearance simply to ensure that this woman has become his life partner for a lifetime.
- Set the boundaries from the beginning: Each relationship needs to draw certain boundaries that the other side does not cross, so each side should draw their own boundaries from the beginning and speak out with the other.
- Learn to say "No": It is important that each party use the word "no" when the situation requires, which avoids a lot of differences later.
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